At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
