good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
