please come you make the beer taste better
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
