i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
