I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I think your dad took our porno
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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