you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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