Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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