just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
