i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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