Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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