My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
