Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
just tell him i said nine months
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
