he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
