I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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