Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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