3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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