ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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