I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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