So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm just crazy horny about you
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
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