Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
