i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
i now understand why vodka
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
