My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
why didn't you poke me back
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
