so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
