Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
