i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
