Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
