covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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