Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
