my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
