apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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