The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
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its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I need moral support for this bender
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
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look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
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