haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
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No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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