Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Randomize
