Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
They took my balls.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize