i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
is wine microwaveable?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
