Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
