she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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