Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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