so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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