wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who died my cat blue again?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize