Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize