Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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