It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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