she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
