Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
