There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste