dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
