Texts From Last Night

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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.

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  (701): Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives. http://tfl.nu/vpi4
  Replies (22) Good night (7596) Bad night (1631)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.

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  (607): Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later. http://tfl.nu/om4f
  Replies (27) Good night (4732) Bad night (1524)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.

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  (605): I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us. http://tfl.nu/gkw5
  Replies (7) Good night (3111) Bad night (954)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out

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  (281): She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out http://tfl.nu/guh4
  Replies (33) Good night (11332) Bad night (1279)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.

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  (775): You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun. http://tfl.nu/rs7k
  Replies (6) Good night (2465) Bad night (814)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.

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  (612): I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover. http://tfl.nu/pxbl
  Replies (8) Good night (3982) Bad night (960)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.

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  (715): Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out. http://tfl.nu/yvz7
  Replies (13) Good night (2770) Bad night (635)
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  (516): View more from New York

  If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles

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  (516): If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles http://tfl.nu/okmw
  Replies (4) Good night (1591) Bad night (1145)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.

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  (518): I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures. http://tfl.nu/io2e
  Replies (3) Good night (1712) Bad night (486)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.

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  (717): I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups. http://tfl.nu/ij1j
  Replies (1) Good night (1282) Bad night (461)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on

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  (775): Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on http://tfl.nu/ndqt
  Replies (3) Good night (1033) Bad night (1120)
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  (873): View more from

  I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in

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  (873): I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in http://tfl.nu/bvll
  Replies (3) Good night (2024) Bad night (445)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager

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  (705): I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager http://tfl.nu/uera
  Replies (2) Good night (525) Bad night (459)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...

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  (405): Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time... http://tfl.nu/6vqb
  Replies (1) Good night (487) Bad night (271)
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  (585): View more from New York

  PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME

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  (585): PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME http://tfl.nu/x279
  Replies (7) Good night (353) Bad night (183)

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