Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Randomize
