So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
