im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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